More hits

I've spent the past months trying to find/create joy in my new place. Now, all I have again is grief. No little girls allowed over. I'm so damn crippled by the damage to my hip that most movement hurts excruciatingly. Think ice picks jabbing into the joint. I'm only mobile in a wheelchair, and I can't move around in the yard, because the wheelchair sinks in the mole mounds. Now, after a summer of planting things rescued and new, it has gotten very cold, very quickly. For those of you untutored in plant chemistry, this means that many plants did not have enough warning, and time, to convert starches to sugars, also known as antifreeze. It is VERY likely that I have lost kiwis, Paulownia, elderberry, just for starters. I can't sleep with the window open, as the window froze open. How do I get actual pain relief from my doctor?

Will it ever be home?

View from the south

Of course, furniture was bought for him...

and her

Even the shy one has joined us in bed

View from my bedroom door, facing southwest

Goodbye old place

D, S, and P in old kitchen

Front porch (and yes, D did walk out the open door you see, at night, forgetting that there was no longer a porch there. Damage only to his dignity.)

Bathroom, bedroom, utility room, kitchen

Living room and sliding glass door onto front porch

H's old bedroom, and kitty cat safe haven

Carport and floor

Last bits

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Watchful figure

Well, at least it was reassuring to find Gandalf on duty nearby.

"Around the bend"

Hmm. I am living just around a turn in the road from extended family. They are going to create magnets to post at their house to alert other members of the household as to where they are. Going to Nana's will be going around the bend. Hmm...

"This is the land that we call home"

I have forfeited my right to say that. I have betrayed the land that I have loved. I've sold it to someone who lives by the bulldozer. I am screaming silently in agony, I've betrayed myself, and I will never be alive again.

Changes

After all my pleasure back out in my garden, back on my own land, planting things, mulching things, watching my daffodils bloom, I am committing to attempting to sell my place, and buy a place near the house my daughter and granddaughter share with friends. Grief.